Recommended Reading
Many of my clients like having something to work on between sessions. These are books I recommend regularly, organized by topic. Some are classics that have stood the test of time. Others are newer works that offer practical, evidence-based strategies. All of them are books I’ve either used in my own practice or found genuinely useful for the people I work with.
Relationships and Couples
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. The foundational Gottman book. If you’re in couples counseling or considering it, start here.
The Relationship Cure by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. Goes deeper into emotional bids and how small moments of connection (or disconnection) shape your relationship over time.
Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. Real case studies of couples who turned things around. Useful if you want to see the Gottman approach in action.
Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson. An emotionally focused approach to understanding the attachment patterns that drive conflict in relationships.
Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel. A frank, intelligent look at maintaining desire and connection in long-term relationships.
Parenting and Families
The Heart of Parenting by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. How to raise an emotionally intelligent child. Gottman’s research applied to the parent-child relationship.
How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. A classic. Practical, specific, and it works.
Get Out of My Life, But First Could You Drive Me and Cheryl to the Mall? by Anthony Wolf. If you have a teenager, this book will make you feel less alone.
Grounded for Life: Stop Blowing your Fuse and Start Communicating with your Teen by Louise Felton Tracy.
How to Really Love your Teenager by Ross Campbell.
The Whole-Brain Child by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. and Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D. Neuroscience made practical for everyday parenting moments.
Blended Families
Stepfamilies: Stepping Ahead by Mala Burt.
Family Rules: Helping Stepfamilies and Single Parents Build Happy Homes by Jeanette Lofas.
Mom’s House/Dad’s House: A Complete Guide for Parents who are Separated, Divorced or Remarried by Isolina Ricci.
Anxiety and Stress
Dare by Barry McDonagh. A practical, no-nonsense approach to anxiety and panic attacks. Many of my clients have found this one especially helpful.
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D. How trauma and stress live in the body, and what to do about it. Essential reading if you’ve experienced trauma.
The Wisdom of Insecurity by Alan Watts. A different angle on anxiety. Watts argues that our constant search for security is itself the source of much of our suffering.
Depression and Grief
It’s OK That You’re Not OK by Megan Devine. The best book I’ve found on grief. Validates the experience without trying to fix it.
Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by David D. Burns, M.D. The classic cognitive behavioral approach to depression. Evidence-based and practical.
Personal Growth and Mindfulness
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Also available on audiobook, which is how I’d recommend experiencing it.
Stillness Speaks by Eckhart Tolle. Shorter and more distilled than The Power of Now. Good if you want the core ideas without the full book.
A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle.
Be Here Now by Ram Dass. A book I have a personal connection to, having contributed as a guest author to the 40th anniversary edition in 2010.
Build A Better Buddha by James Robbins.
The Book: On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are by Alan Watts.
Become What You Are by Alan Watts.
Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl. A psychologist’s account of finding purpose in the most extreme suffering imaginable. Short, powerful, and life-changing for many readers.
Atomic Habits by James Clear. Not a therapy book, but incredibly useful for anyone trying to build better patterns in their life.
Deeper Exploration
These are for people drawn to philosophy, spirituality, physics, and the bigger questions. Not for everyone, but transformative for the right reader.
Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda.
No Boundary by Ken Wilber. A Brief History of Everything, also by Ken Wilber.
The Elegant Universe by Brian Greene.
Dancing Wu Li Masters by Gary Zukav.
Holographic Universe by Michael Talbot.
The Mysticism of Sound and Music by Hazrat Inayat Khan.
Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse.
The Celestine Prophecy by James Redfield (plus The 10th Insight and Secrets of Shambhala).
Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman.
Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu, translated by Jane English and Gia-Fu Feng.
Conversations with God (Books 1, 2, and 3) by Neale Donald Walsch.
The Mahabharata. The Bible. Spiritual texts from traditions that have carried wisdom across centuries.
And a Few More
The Cat in the Hat. Oh, the Places You’ll Go! Green Eggs and Ham. Speak Softly and Carry a Beagle.
Dr. Seuss and Charles Schulz understood something about the human condition that a lot of psychology textbooks miss. If you see a theme here, you’re paying attention.
Anything you enjoy. Anything that challenges you.
If you have a book you think should be on this list, let me know.